there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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