Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
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