You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize
