Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
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