Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
