it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
operation have a gay friend backfired
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Randomize
