Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
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