Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize