Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Randomize
