I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize
