she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Randomize