He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
