Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
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