Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
