Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Whoa!!! Accidentally took a dump in chick's bathroom at Red Robin. 1 hr for coast to be clear. Women's farts sound like geese taking last breath. Liars.
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Still dying that you shit outside
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
