i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
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