theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Randomize
