sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
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