She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Randomize
