Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
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