yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize
