All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
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