you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
