That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
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