I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
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