I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize
