Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Randomize
