bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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