I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
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