Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Randomize
