Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
