I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
I cut my penus on the lid.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
