Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
Randomize
