I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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