how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
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