Define "chronic" masturbator.
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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