OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings
youre going to kill that woman one of these days
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Randomize