i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Randomize
