no. you can't hotbox the world.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Randomize
