The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
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