Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
