I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize
