Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
17 Subtle Body Language Signs That Reveal A Lot About Someone
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
These 21 Declassified Government Horrors Are Unimaginable
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
3 2 1 whiskey
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on