The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
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