Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
Randomize