I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
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