i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
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