kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
be right there i have to get my cape
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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