we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
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You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
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Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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