It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
Randomize
